Before P.J. Fleck took the head coaching job for the University of Minnesota’s football program, his wife asked him a simple question, “Are you sure you want to take on another ‘Year One’?”  She remembered when her husband took the reins at Western Michigan, and just how challenging it truly was. There was significant pressure to show immediate results and earn buy-in from a team that was already in place, and who likely chose that school because of the coach that was no longer there.  He would have to go in build a relationship with the coaches and players, instill new game plans and philosophies, and make adjustments to either build upon or establish new systems.  This process takes time! I’m not a D-1 head football coach, but can only imagine the physical, emotional and mental energy it would take to get everyone “Rowing the Boat” in the same direction and downstream. New atmospheres, conditions and opportunities can be tough for all of us, not just for Coach Fleck or college coaches. Because our minds are conditioned for survival, they often go directly towards a pessimistic state – making overcoming challenges even harder than they could be otherwise.

Throughout my career I have transitioned into leadership roles within organizations and felt extremely prepared for the new role.  The business plan was buttoned up, the strategy was set and the vision was in place.  I had even seen previous transitions play out firsthand and knew how much patience and time it takes to experience progress.  Despite the experience and exposure, I have struggled personally during periods of change.  Just like Coach Fleck’s wife suggested – change is hard, and for me it has led to negative thought loops and self-doubt.

“The body should be treated rigorously, that it may not be disobedient to the mind.” – Seneca

“You have to change yourself before you can change your circumstance”

–David Meltzer

During transition periods, it was still hard to not question the future and play out worst-case scenarios in my head:

What if this decision doesn’t go my way?

Then this will lead to that negative outcome.

When that outcome plays out then the whole operation will fail.

I will then be the leader who led us straight to that destination.

Sound familiar? It takes five seconds for one negative thought to lead to hours of meditation on a scenario that is unrealistic and will never happen. Quit wasting your time and mental energy on hypothetical scenarios that are created by your brain.

Pain + Reflection = Progress

“When you focus on problems, you will have more problems. When you focus on possibilities, you will find more opportunities.”–Zig Ziglar

I share this, because I see so many salespeople struggle with negative thought-loops. Similar negative patterns really affected me until recently, when I took ownership and control over this area in my life. With the pandemic and uncertainty of the sports industry over the last six months, I feel it is all the more important to help encourage others who may be having anxiety about change in their own lives.

No matter the circumstance; whether it’s the first time in a new role or pivots caused by pandemics, it’s important to win the battle in your mind.

1. Trust the wait. You are being prepared for your blessings. In order to receive, you actually have to be ready to receive. Situations you’re going through are not random. Everything you go through, grows you. Trust the season of preparation. Sometimes you have to be patient for the next season and the next chapter of your life. While you are in your current position/circumstance there is always room for self-development and reflection. Stretch yourself where you are right now.

2. “Sometimes when you’re in a dark place, you think you have been buried.  But you’ve actually been planted.” –Christine Caine. I have found that when the student is ready, the teacher appears. The greatest lessons learned in my life have come from the most unexpected places. In these moments, blind spots have been exposed and I have been able to stretch my capacity significantly as a result. You are where you are for a reason.

3. Your struggle is part of your story. Appreciate the journey. Your struggles and pain allow you to grow and learn. Without them, we wouldn’t be who we are today.

4. Don’t ask “Why is this happening to me?”—Change the perspective to “What is this teaching me?” When I adjusted my mindset, my outlook and perspective changed and suddenly I enjoyed each day moving forward. This simple pivot allowed me to appreciate that when the picture in my mind didn’t play out exactly as I expected, it allowed me to rise and solve new challenges.

The one consistent life has in store for us is change. We must be willing to embrace the change that comes our way, as it isn’t always our plan or chosen path that we had envisioned. As we become better suited to handle and navigate these changes (and challenges), we can better move forward. As someone who loves to plan, anticipate and see around corners – I can tell you firsthand that things don’t always play out the way we want. However, I can also confidently say that when things haven’t played out according to my will, I have been able to grow significantly and learn from the circumstance. So much falls back to our perspective and mindset. The more we can control our mind and thought process, the easier it is to put our best foot forward and create the future.